Saturday, March 19, 2011

Nine Months

So the last nine months have been hard.

If you would have told me last June that over the course of the next nine months I would deal with my father having one pretty serious stroke (plus two mini-strokes), summer classes, training 100 teachers, teaching a new grade for the sixth time in seven years, three family members dying, two illnesses of my own (one of which I'm waiting to find out what exactly it is), and some more stuff that just won't make it into this post.

I wish I could say I've been the model Christian.  That I've trusted God at every turn and humbly accepted every single day as a gift.

Mostly, it's been a lot of questioning.  A couple of tears, and many, "Are you certain about this, Lord?"

Thursday evening I came home with what soon turned into a migraine headache.  I went to bed at six pm, hoping that turning in early and taking my medicine would end that headache.  I awoke at midnight, where I spent a half hour throwing up.  Then my other sickness kicked in and I was awake until about six a.m.  Friday was not a pretty day for me. 

I serve a big God. One who still loves and forgives us even when we are less than perfect. And one who knows our every need.

Last night, sitting in my bed, in the midst of just trying to recuperate, I felt God speak to me.  And he told me, "You're right where you need to be."  I turned off the tv and just sat, trying to soak in the moment, making sure I wasn't imagining things.  And I really felt assured it was God.  It reminded me of Zephaniah 3: 17, "The Lord your God is with you, the Mighty Warrior who saves.  He will take great delight in you; in his love he will no longer rebuke you, but rejoice over you with singing."

I felt like I was being rejoiced over.  And I do know, according to Romans 8:28, that God will work all this together for His glory. 

I once read a read a quote that said, "One of the kindest things God ever did was put a curtain over tomorrow." 

And for that, I am thankful.

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